'O Brave New World that has Such People in It'

We’re about to get so much dumber.

With that polarizing introduction, we’ve reached a fork in the road at the first sentence of this column (a new record) and it’s safe to say you’re in one of two groups. You either take some level of offense at the implication that we’re already dumb, or you think I’m a liar because it isn’t possible that we could get any dumber.

To those in the first group let me direct you to some proof we’re not the sharpest crayons in the box: People crash texting and driving all the time, slippery when wet signs exist, millions of people watched Jersey Shore, Tik Tok is the most downloaded app in America, Pet Rocks were incredibly successful endeavor. Snuggies.

To those in the second group (which is surely everyone now), buckle up. We’re on the cusp of full-on Idiocracy. Now, you could come to this conclusion watching a single cable news broadcast, or observing the state of our nation’s political discourse, or by counting the number of pre-teens with social media accounts.

However, these aren’t what’s going to accelerate the dumbing down of America to warp speed. This is: Artificial Intelligence writing “assistants.”

AI writing assistants, while designed to enhance productivity and creativity, inadvertently contribute to a decline in human intellect. As we increasingly rely on these digital tools to craft our emails, reports, and even creative writing, we risk losing the very skills that define us as thinking beings.

The act of writing  - structuring thoughts, choosing words carefully, and constructing coherent arguments - stimulates cognitive functions and deepens our understanding of language and ideas. With AI taking on these tasks, our brains are given less exercise in these critical areas, leading to a potential erosion of our ability to think critically, solve problems creatively, and express ourselves with nuance and precision. Thus, AI writing assistants pose a subtle yet profound threat to our intellectual vitality.

The preceding two paragraphs were brought to you by Microsoft CoPilot. Microsoft CoPilot is an AI Writing Assistant that recently appeared on my computer.  And by appeared I mean butted in entirely uninvited. And I’m telling you, in a matter of years a vast majority of the writing you encounter on a daily basis will be, either wholly or in part, produced by AI programs like CoPilot.

And our technological overlords are making it so easy. All I had to do to produce those two artificial (inhuman?) paragraphs was click the little twisty icon that kept showing up next to where I was typing and tell CoPilot what I wanted to write.

I said, “Write a paragraph about how AI writing assistants are going to make everyone dumber.”

I got an error that said, “Copilot can’t generate high-quality content for this. Please change your description and try again.”

So I said the exact same thing but changed the last word from dumber to “less smart.” Apparently CoPilot has been designed to be political correct. CoPilot then heartily obliged and produced the two aforementioned paragraphs. It took 11 seconds. And that includes the time to tell me to change my description.

Unless you’re trying to read this on your phone while driving, I imagine (I hope) something about those robo-paragraphs struck you as strange. I mean, the tone wasn’t in keeping with the rest of the column, there wasn’t a single mention of parenthood or kids, and there was that suspicious “thus.”

But even if they didn’t you may be wondering: Why is this in a Daddy Days column? Because if you’re my age-ish, it’s our kids that are going to be the guinea pigs in this brave new world of inhuman intelligence. If you’re my parents’ age it’s going to be your grandkids. Anyone else want to pump the breaks a little on the outsourcing of human thought and communication?

Now reread the first sentence. There’s a subtle something hopeful in it. We’re not dumber yet. There’s still time. And, since I insulted everyone by collectively calling us dumb, you can be sure at least this column was actually written by a fallible human. For now.