The Gravitational Pull of a Closed Door
There are certain objects that seem to have an almost gravitational pull on kids. Fire is a quick example and running water too. You don’t have to say anything, or rather you have to tell them to stay away if you don’t want them by the fire or water, because they will start moving in the direction of either immediately.
But the item with
the strongest gravitational pull is a closed door. We’re talking Star Trek
tractor beam level of pull here. A closed door attracts kids like a light
attracts moths.
It doesn’t even
make sense. I’ll say something about doing some work in a room and close the
door. The entire rest of the house will be a fine place to play. There will be
something in the range of 2,000 square feet of air-conditioned space (plus the
garage and backyard) to play in, yet for some reason all six boys will end up in
the four feet immediately outside my closed door.
When I come out
and get on to them about playing right here, they seem a little bit surprised
they’re playing there too. Gravitational pull, I’m telling you.
It’s the same sort
of thing with a closed bathroom door. This seems to be worse for moms of young
kids than dads. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen a kid plop down
outside the bathroom door like they’re a traffic cone as soon as Mom or Dad
goes into the bathroom.
I distinctly
recall when we were kids that several of my siblings would stick their hands
under the bathroom door and wiggle their fingers saying, “hi Mom!” if Mom ever
went into the bathroom. To any of my kids reading this, it was only my siblings
who did this and I definitely didn’t participate.
The ultimate
closed door with gravitational pull is Dad and Mom’s door when they’re trying
to have a grown-ups-only conversation. This one is next level because the kids will
pile up outside the door like they’re doing a sit in.
In our house it’s impossible
for grown ups to have a conversation without a kid overhearing it if a door
isn’t closed, so closed door conferences happen regularly. However, the
youngest ones figure nothing could possibly take more than two to three minutes
to talk about so they start knocking. So, not only do we have what appears to
be a group of protestors outside the door, but they’re making demands too.