Sometimes Kids...
Sometimes kids, how do I put this…screw everything up.
You’re in a great mood, you take them to do something special and they pout,
whine, or fight about everything. If you’ve been a parent for almost any length
of time, you know what I’m talking about.
You grill hot dogs and make macaroni and cheese (their
favorites) and they act like you're feeding them cat food. You take them to a
huge playground on the other side of town and after hours of play they throw
one of those reality TV show worthy fits with “rubber legs” and everything.
You let them ride in the car as you go through the car wash
and they freak out like you’re trying to feed them to a dinosaur (ok, bad
example. That one’s on me). But when you splurge on an extra special day out
and they refuse to participate in anything other than whining about how they
want to go home and “do not want to have fun” that’s on them.
It's ingratitude and it's a big part of what makes the life
of a parent one of sacrifice. You give of yourself and get nothing in return;
or worse. Imagine you gave up six months’ worth of sleep to give someone ice
cream and tell them you love them and they responded by screaming in your face
and pooping their pants. Well, if you’re the parent of a newborn, you don’t
have to imagine this scenario. It’s called Tuesday. And Wednesday, and
Thursday...
However, there's a profound lesson to be learned in a
child's ungratefulness and their rejection of a parent's freely given love. As
a parent, you realize that even with all the ingratitude and poor behavior you
still love your kids. Actually, it’s so deeply rooted you never even have to
think about it.
Now, don’t get me wrong, parents are human so I’m not saying
this constant audience with the ungrateful is a walk in the park. It’s not. And
it’s not something I would encourage my kids to be, however it’s the default
setting of the parent/child relationship. Ungrateful kids being taken care of
by loving parents is normal. And I suspect the ungratefulness isn’t something
kids ever fully outgrow.
Except me of course.
So the next time I give one of the boys a present that takes
me half a day to assemble and they don’t appreciate it, I’ll calmly look back
on this column and, thoroughly unbothered, realize this is just the way things
go.
Insert wild laughter here. Let’s be real. Most likely if the
above situation happens, I’ll completely forget this column, be thoroughly
bothered, and vocalize that I do not understand why things are going the way
they are.
Even if I can’t maintain this perspective I can at least
hope one day the kids come to understand it as parents. After all, nothing
helps bring to light the truth behind the parent/child relationship like a
colicky baby. Not that I would wish that on anyone.